I’m finding it difficult to blog just once per week, which is particularly interesting since it has only been three days from when I made my declaration. It’s just that my brain swirls with thoughts about running and health and life, and it’s difficult to stop a tornado.
The only way I can think of to do that is to write. Writing is magic. The benefits are a lot like running. It improves my mood, gives me a sense of accomplishment and, well, it’s just fun. Like I told Mr. T the other day, “I freakin’ love to write.” Spoken like a true writer. I heard that’s exactly what Hemingway said when asked about his passion.
But writing out your thoughts on all subjects all the time gobbles up a good part of the day. Especially for me since I’m a re-writer. (This explains why some of the world’s greatest authors are also extremely anti-social. No time for people. Must write. Thoughts. Now.)
What I think I need to learn to do is to let go of some of the words. Release them like balloons at a parade. I don’t need to hold on to all of them. Do I? Do I really need to pack them up and lug them along with me for the rest of my life?
I blame part of this word-hording problem on my memory. It’s not the greatest. My friend Kallie can recall amazing details about her life, like what she was wearing on the fourth day of first grade. I can’t remember what year that was. My outfit? Forget it.
I feel I have to write down every single thought that breezes between my ears. Just in case I need it later. This is hard to do when you have a job, a kid, a husband, a TV…a training plan, a gym membership.
But all this writing isn’t a bad thing. My mom-blog, Sanity Department, is full of memories about T Junior and Mr. T, and how I was feeling about mommyhood during the first year of my son’s life. I should be writing more of those things down now, but running-related topics usurp them.
I hope cutting back here will make some room in my head for life stories. When they float in I’ll swoop them up with an imaginary net and jot them down on something tangible – like a real journal with paper pages and everything.
For example, I don’t want to forget the conversation I had with my two-year-old last week. T Junior stopped kicking his mini soccer ball and stood still, his bare feet nestled in the front lawn. A passenger jet rumbled in the distance.
T Junior cocked his head, but kept his eyes on me. “Airplane comin’.”
“Yep. That’s right. I hear it.”
He straightened up. Serious. “A wanna touch a airplane.”
How do you address a request like that? I decided on: “Well, it’s really high up in the sky. We can’t reach it.” I hoped it would do.
T Junior turned his cheek-dominated face up to the blue. He squinted. “A wanna touch the sun.”
So you see what I’m talking about?! When I’m looking back at my life, what’s more important? That beautiful, curious moment with my son in the front yard or how many minutes I passed on the elliptical while listening to Ke$ha tell off her cheating boyfriend and Taio Cruz worry about karma?
Don’t get me wrong. The exercise is important. I need that so that I can look back at my life. But I don’t need to take the memory with me, just the benefits.
That being said – and it had to be said because it was driving me crazy – I love writing about running, so I don’t think I can give it all up just yet. I’m going to start with once a week and see if that helps. Thank you so much for your nice words about my last post! It means a lot to me!
COMING UP LATER TODAY: Summer of Weight Loss Challenge and more!