Remember the part in the movie City Slickers when the characters are recalling a scene from the 1948 Western, Red River?
Yeah, the “yee-haw” scene.
Billy Crystal, Daniel Stern and the rest of the motley wannabe cowboys are sitting on their horses about to embark on a poorly planned cattle drive. But before they take off, they decide to do their own “yee-haw” scene and each of the men (and one woman) waves their hats and hollers their own versions of “yeeeeeeeeee-hawwww!” (that’s how I’d do it – think Jessie from Toy Story 2).
Afterward Crystal, in his blue Mets baseball hat, looks at Stern and asks, “Do you feel like a schmuck?” Stern quickly replies: “Oh yeah. Big schmuck.”
That was me, pool running, this morning.
The thing with pool running, while I know it’s good for you being that it gives you a workout with no- to low-impact yada-yada-yada, is that it’s just so awkward-looking. There are a number of reasons for this.
First, as in any water activity, there’s the whole matter of wearing a bathing suit. Next, there’s the flattering flotation device (pool belt) you wear to keep you from sinking – sort of a weight-lifting belt on…well…steroids.
Then there’s the actual act of pool running in which you’re legs are executing a strange sort of furious high-knee dog paddle – your arms pumping in all directions, your lower abs cramping, the tops of your thighs burning, your toes desperately trying to grab the water — while the only visible part of you (your head with mouth agape) inches forward at a rate of 60-minutes-per-mile while actual swimmers in the lane beside you gracefully, swiftly cut through the water’s surface, their gentle arm-slapping sounds lulling your brain into a somewhat Zen state, yet at the same time, heightening your awareness of just how goofy you really look.
Oh yeah. Big schmuck.
Ok, I have to ask: do you do this in the deep end of the pool? Cuz ya known I can't run for like a billion more years and it was suggested I pool run….well, the pool I belong to is shallow and only for laps – I'm not sure how I'd not be running on the bottom of the pool!?!? I guess I'll stick to laps and the dreaded bike. bleh. Schmuck or not, you're getting a workout in, yay!!
Yes, I run in the deep end. I think you could do shallow-end running. Still less impact than the real deal. 🙂
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Hahahaha! You are too funny. But I totally know what you mean – I did pool running once or twice last fall when I was injured. I too felt like a dork… thus was born my love for spinning! But kudos to you for getting it done! Hope the foot is 100% real soon.
Hilarious! I think we need a video re-enactment!!
Yes, I'm with Marlene. I don't really understand and I think a video would really clear things up.Hahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahaha!
This post is hilarious. I am so sorry about the pool running… it sounds pretty miserable. Good for you for doing it! Don't feel like a schmuck (love the reference!) feel hardcore. 🙂
I can't believe you quoted City Slickers, that's awesome! We quote from the original and the sequel all the time around here! One of my favorites has to be when Phil is arguing with his wife at Mitch's birthday party: “If hate were people, I'd be China!” Classic! We don't have belts, but we love to run in our pool. We have races running forward, backward, sideways….whatever we can think of. We do it just for fun, but it does really give you a good workout. And yeah, we look like schmucks, too.